Tag Archives: Solo Trip Planning

Solo Skills: Learning On The Road

In everyday life, I rarely have sense of pure learning – using all my wits to learn with intention, speed, in real-time. Negotiating, assessing, aligning. We do that everyday but not pure survival learning. Maybe a new device or a new tool but it’s rarely pure or primary.

When you travel, particularly when you travel alone, you are called on to learn new skills in order to go forward. When you’re traveling, whether it’s how to use an electric shower (first, really, and, second, who knew you had to turn on the outlet) or driving in a new way, it’s full body and fast track.

Keep Left: Survival Learning. Imagine you arrive in Edinburgh with jet lag using your last spark of energy to argue with the arrogant rental car clerk who thinks you can be swayed by an upgrade to a monster truck with backup screens and refuses to address the incremental cost on your prepaid car. At last, spent, you find yourself sitting in the driver’s seat, on the unfamiliar side of the car, in a cramped lot, pointed toward EXIT with twelve roundabouts between you and your destination.

Here is what I discovered on that first day. There isn’t anyone but you. This creates clarity. No help but also no distraction. Finally I was safely parked in Stirling and there were three rules that helped get me there.

  • First observe deeply, taking time to watch everything around you. Then watch again.
  • Accept that following is acceptable for a beginner. The guy driving the plumbing van – it isn’t his first day. Follow until you figure it out.
  • Last, go slow, go with flow.

Beware Right Turns: The Discipline of Attention
Since I did survive, the next step is attentiveness. Every time I got in the car, I repeated the mantra. Every time. Pay attention. Keep left. Beware right turns. Driving well is more important than the GPS lady’s instructions or her begrudging approval. You can always turn around. Eventually.

The first time I thought I had it down and relaxed, I turned right with great confidence into the proper left lane, but had the left-over and inappropriate relaxed approach to the right turn.  I was lucky that the truck coming my way was still far away. It helped me maintain a keenness of focus for the rest of week.

The Good Stuff: Getting Creative
It was time to go to the Isle of Mull.  I had my driving mojo and was ready. Then I landed on a single track road, going up a mountain full of hairpin turns, and, should you begin to relax, recalcitrant sheep.  It seemed there was no way to know as you went around a blind curve if you’d meet a truck or van or worse, another tourist. After thinking it through, I realized that while I couldn’t see the next 300 yards, with the switchbacks, I could see the road farther along. If I waited a bit on the shoulder, I could know the hidden road was clear. I started keeping my eye on the mid distance…and the sheep.

So What?  Why Solo Travel Keeps You Sharp
When you meet an new, out-of-your-zone challenge on your own, you use your whole intellect, your ability to observe, and your experience. It’s a souvenir that you bring home.

I thought about John Wesley’s teaching and the quadrilateral of seeing life and faith through scripture, tradition, experience and reason. It’s not a great fit since both my travel scripture and the traditional writings of the Church fathers would both be Rick Steves and Karen Brown, but you may find that you depend a lot on reading and research, experience and observation, and daily honed reason.

In the end, is it heightened awareness or high-speed learning? Is it just truly paying attention?  Whatever you call it, I want to take this into my everyday life – upping the percentage of wit and wisdom I bring to the opportunity at hand.

What I Learned about Travel

Travelling on your own, even for part of a trip, heightens your senses.
Never go on auto pilot. Ever.
It is worth it – get the car!

Going Solo Behind the Wheel: Your First Driving Adventure

I imagined winding through Tuscany in a convertible with the top down, a scarf around windblown hair, past hill towns, vineyards, and down lanes lined by tall cypress trees.  Reality was that my first driving abroad did wind through the Tuscan hills but in a Ford Escort wearing a hoodie with my nervous and reluctant parents in the back seat.

It was still great!  Having a car let our family explore the countryside with freedom and see places on country roads that a train could never reach. And we felt more a part of the life of the community and countryside.

When I began to take trips on my own, driving alone seemed out of reach. It took a while to build my confidence to set out in my own wheels – but when I did it was spectacular.  This isn’t about the technical how-to of driving but about how you can feel confident and enjoy a solo driving trip if you like the idea.

I started in Iceland which was surprisingly ideal. For one, it seemed to be a necessity.  There isn’t a train system and many of the sites are not within towns or cities. It’s an easy start to driving on your own – the traffic is light and for my itinerary, it was mainly rural driving and…all on the right side of the road.   

My plane landed in the early morning at Keflavik. I rented my car and loaded my bag…and realized it was incredibly windy and dark. It’s ok to take a minute so I decided going right back inside for a bit of breakfast was a good plan. As the sun rose, I took off for my hotel at the Blue Lagoon, near the airport.

The highlight of the Icelandic driving trip for me was waking before dawn (which wasn’t challenging in November) and driving through the starlit morning to see the sun rise over the glacial lagoon, Jökulsárlón.

What about that confidence? Before I set off, I considered those worries and faced them head on. I knew that here the actual driving was much like home. The car and the roads were familiar but what was the concern?  The evening before, I had a long talk with the hotel staff. Was it safe to be on the road before dawn (well, yes, most working people are in winter), what should I do if I had a breakdown? Were the gas stations manned? I got good and reassuring information, an offer of breakfast box, and set my alarm.

At Jökulsárlón, I pulled into the small lot just before the sun broke the horizon at about 10 a.m.  I was there with a hearty group of fellow travelers and watched the light hit the blue ice for the first time that day and walked along the volcanic black sand in the morning mist.  Many of us decamped to a travel center/gas station and had the best waffles in the world.

Driving back to the hotel, I had a surge of joy in being on the road in such a beautiful landscape and feeling that I was a confident citizen of the world.  And glad I was at ease with a stick shift.

Since then, I’ve built my confidence to drive in Scotland, Ireland, Mallorca, and again in Italy. There are great car rental places abroad, some with names you know. Do read up on how the insurance works. Your credit card may provide insurance if you follow their guidelines. Know that the same rental chain or credit card may have different rules depending on the country you visit.  It just takes a little online reading and research.  Here are a few tips that work for me.

What I Learned

Where to start is important. If your trip begins in a major city, enjoy the public transportation then take a train or subway to a rental office outside the urban area to rent your car and start your drive.  For example, leave Dublin on the DART train and rent in Dun Laoghaire.  It’s a calmer start and easier return.

Rent the smallest car you can. You may be graciously offered an “upgrade” to a larger car.  Insist if you can on the car you chose – easier to park, navigate narrow country lanes, and keep fuel costs lower.

Watch some of the online videos about driving in your area. It’s oddly useful to watch a video from behind the wheel.

Print out your map and directions even though you’ll likely depend on GPS.  I use my phone now just like I do when I’m home but sometimes your connection can cause a little delay, or you may lose your connection.  It’s good backup!

Learn the street and highway signs before you go even if you know the language of the area. Some are just icons and shapes and colors.  Seriously do this homework and you’ll feel like a pro.

Always fill up or top off your tank when you see a station. Why not? It’s an easy stress relief.

Breathe. Pack snacks. If you love to drive, the freedom of your own wheels is exhilerating.

Getting Started Part 3: One City, Expanded

When you think about a favorite travel stay, do you remember walking the neighborhood early in the morning, finding that great little bakery, or shopping the local markets?

A well-traveled friend, also named Susan, described her favorite hotels in a city she visits often – one small hotel she loved for the quiet street, the walking neighborhood, and the cozy bar.  But another larger hotel was full of history, great Art Deco décor, luxurious afternoon tea, and was, for her, full of memories.  So many choices each time she visits.

I shared about an easy way to travel alone by picking just one city and diving deep. A few years ago, I found a 2.0 version of this approach. There are easy ways to expand and experience more without managing many travel details.

First, your hotels.  When I first started travelling solo, due to ‘unforeseen circumstances’, I didn’t stay in the same hotel for my entire visit in Paris.  For the first few days, I was near the Eiffel Tower and close to the food markets on Rue Cler.  I visited little shops that only sold mustard or had fantastic arrays of French cheese and I picnicked in the Champs de Mars.  But then I had to relocate.

For the end of the week, I stayed in the Marais, near the Place des Vosges. It is one of the oldest parts of the city. The whole atmosphere was different.  The streets with the flower shops and balconies were like something out of a children’s book about Paris.  Both hotels and neighborhoods were beautiful but each left me with an entirely different view of the city.

So, as odd as it is, if you are just beginning to build your travel chops, and not quite up for maneuvering planes, trains, and automobiles, you can have varied experiences in a city by splitting your stay.

Now, day trips. Europe in particular has excellent rail systems. From London, you could take a day trip to Cambridge, Oxford, or Bath. From Zurich, take a scenic rail trip through the Alps, have lunch and return in the evening.  Leave your luggage behind and train hop.  All you have to do is catch a train, enjoy the scenery rolling by, and you’re back for dinner and a good night’s sleep.  If you are in a major city and visit a popular area, you’ll have many choices for your return.  This is an easy, low key way to gain experience traveling alone by rail.  (If you are travelling with others, taking a day to yourself to do this on your own as a great beginning.)

What I Learned

Have fun picking your hotels. If you are only there for a couple of nights, try something different or a little unusual. Or a bit more luxurious than your usual choice. It’s an opportunity!

Correspond with the hotel or inn.  I wrote to a small hotel in Paris on a whim just to let them know that I was travelling with only hand luggage. If there was a great room that wasn’t quite reached by the elevators, I was game. I ended up with a view of the Eiffel Tower. And I got plenty of steps in.

Take a vacation from your vacation.  Having a day with no plans and just going to the train station can be incredibly freeing.  Where can you go in 2 hours or less? Is there a great return schedule? Try it.

Pack light, try new things, and wander!

Getting Started: Taking Your First Solo Adventure

You can begin traveling on your own now, starting slow, building up skills, and testing your confidence level. Learning is in itself a journey with some pretty significant benefits.

When you talk with friends who love to travel, they can usually tell you how they got started, especially if you buy the wine.  My first trip abroad, in high school, was with a mixed group of students and recent retirees, a trip of a lifetime for all of us. For months, I slept with the brochure at my bedside, memorized the itinerary, and dreamed about what we’d see. It was a supportive first trip for a kid from the rural south to learn about currency exchange, public transportation, and why the English put butter on my ham sandwich. How do you make the next step?

Here are some great ways to begin. I’ve overthought this so you’ll see upcoming blogs on each possibility.

Visit a resort with lots of activities.  This is how I began travelling alone, with a destination spa resort full of classes and events to schedule.  I visited Miraval, a destination spa in Tucson, that was like summer camp for grownups. At the resort, I met people in classes, went to happy hour, and even had a seat at a single traveler’s dinner table. I was in control of the amount of solitude and independence I wanted.  I met great people, but it was my trip.

Travel to a city that you would love to explore and find a ‘home base’ hotel.  This is a wonderful next step.  I chose Paris.  I’d always wanted the time to walk the city and understand the two banks, the Ile de la Cite, and arrondissements.  Picking the right hotel and making a couple of key activity reservations can make all the difference.

Then the big league. This may be where you start! For me, it took a minute. Letting go of home base, where the staff was there to help, and being truly on the road was a big step.  Eventually, I tried riding the rails, then driving, and ferry-hopping.  Once I was comfortable, I began to crave this freedom of the open road and the possibilities in a day all your own.

On that first trip to Miraval, I pored over the daily offerings and (yes, really) I made a spreadsheet to make sure that I could, if I wanted, fit everything in.  This was very easy travel BUT it helped me learn to to think deeply every day about what I wanted to do (not what I should do or what I said I’d do, and not the spreadsheet).  It actually takes a little practice.

What I Learned

  • The Magic Moment. Feel that moment when you step off a plane, alone, in a new place, with only yourself. No expectations to fulfill, no one waiting for you. You don’t bring all your roles and identities with you unless you choose to. Blank slate!
  • Self-management. One of the hardest things about traveling alone for me is not whether I know how to navigate the world but knowing how to manage myself.  How do you respond when something doesn’t go well? How do you come back from that? Do you remember how to connect with new people? Do you want to? What do YOU want to do today? If you get a handle on this, you’ll see benefits in other areas of your life.
  • Vulnerability.  In other areas of life, you may not be great at asking for help. I practice this more when I’m traveling on my own. If you are gracious and a good listener, asking can make a difference. If I have a concern about my room, I engage the front desk in possibilities. If I need advice about the day, I ask. Your experience is precious. Admit you’re in new territory and sometimes the result is more than you imagine.

Paris in a Day

A wonderful singer songwriter, Ellis Paul, wrote a song, “Paris in a Day. Paris in a Day. Only an American would do Paris in a Day.” And yet!

I had a plan to see Carcassonne and Mont Ste. Michel, using Paris as my home base, flying in for an overnight, training down to see MSM, back to Paris for a wonderful day, then back south to Carcassonne. It made my in-between, full and lovely day in The City of Light very special, like a gem in a setting. Paris wasn’t the purpose of the trip so the day was the vacation from the vacation, no lists, no rules, no expectations.

Sunshine, gracious not glaring, a light breeze, the crunch of gravel under the blooming horse chestnut trees. The sound of distant chatter from a tour boat on the Seine.

Nowhere to be but here.

Shouldn’t every trip have at least one unplanned day to wander? An absolutely unscheduled day that lets you tap into the joy of the traveler. As a type-A traveler, I set challenges, have lists, and push to the next summit.  I can lose the joy before I realize it.

Once, with a whole week to spend in a beautiful city, full of places to be and sights to see, it struck me. This used to be more fun.  My travel lust started at fourteen on a fantastic 16-day trip from London to Lucerne. I still have whole sections of the brochure memorized.  Though I might not feel the same way today as I did then, walking out of the hotel, luggage whisked away and boarding the bus meant anything could happen. I just had to show up.  (The smell of bus fumes in a city still inspire a feeling of possibility and mystery – odd, but true.)

As I stood in the street that day, in that city, I changed my plan.  I had a list of three obscure museums that the average traveler would not find and an address for a great authentic lunch.  I ditched the plan. How could I reclaim that feeling of the naive traveler wandering through the day like a theme park of history and art?  When all else fails, go to the train station.

From the train station, a joyous line of day-trippers was pouring into the streets. Hawkers were selling souvenirs, ice cream and expensive Cokes. I got a $4 Coke Light and joined the crowd. I felt it edging back in – JOY! You could almost hear carnival music.

Wondering with the crowd, I landed in a neighborhood that had eluded me the day before with my map and my list.  There it was – a perfect accident.  I broke my rules and ate in a restaurant with a menu in four languages.  The food was adequate but the people-watching was stellar.

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It was the ultimate day off amid a vacation.  So, back to Paris and the horse chestnut trees.

On this morning, I bought a pastry on the corner and started a slow ramble along the Champs de Mars. Following a bustle of activity, I watched with the crowd as three military helicopters landed like very dusty dragonflies. (We agreed, the crowd and I, that this was either very interesting or very bad.) Then, from far down the park, we heard the jingle of bridles and the most amazing equestrian parade appeared.

A visiting dignitary had apparently arrived and was whisked into L’Ecole Militaire. Soon after, they emerged once more, were bundled into a motorcade, and traveled down the boulevard with brilliantly uniformed riders before, after, and alongside the cars.

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It was spectacular.

And then they were gone, and I continued my stroll. What next?

I like problem-solving and gain great gratification from jumping hurdles and finding myself on the train after a tricky connection or achieving that elusive sunset view at the very right moment.

It is, though, a balance to maintain – the combination of great feats and achieving a purpose and just strolling with a camera and ice cream.  That day in Paris I wore a dress that I almost gave away. “At my age,” I thought, “this dress would only work walking along the Seine in Paris with an ice cream cone.”  So I did and then left the dress for the next guest.